Fans of Felons

 FANS OF FELONS

Having practiced criminal law for many years, I have always subscribed to the notion that felons are people too and should be treated as such.  Not much has come from this notion in that most of the public have had the opinion that a felon is some substandard human being afflicted by some loathsome disease.  I am not of this opinion and never have been.  

Due to my profession, I have had the privilege of meeting, visiting, consulting, and representing hundreds, if not thousands of felons.  I number many as friends, associates, and clients.  They have the normal range of competency as the general public and go about their business on a daily basis as do most of us.  I find the general attitude toward felons as untoward to say the least.

We now have a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to recognize felons as actual citizens, even if they can't vote.  Historically a few felons have been celebrated as quasi heroes; people such as Bonnie and Clyde, Jessie James, Billy the Kid, Capone, etc.  The underlying issues of lawlessness: theft, robbery, assault,  murder, etc. have merely been the methods of becoming folk heroes.

Of what I speak, and the circumstances of this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, is the conviction of Donald Trump on thirty-four felony counts.  Who would have thought?  Suddenly we have a new folk hero who, having eluded criminal prosecution until almost eighty, is now a FELON!  The public loves it, they now have a new folk hero - - an unlikely one, but a hero nevertheless.  A man who has spent his life cheating, lying, suing, berating, and otherwise treating people poorly is now a felon and hence, a person legitimately recognizable as a folk hero.

What is needed is a nationally syndicated fan club - - Fans of Felons.  Now that we have this national movement to excoriate the judicial system and hence create a new folk hero, it is time that we move on this.  We need a Fan of Felons organization; a national organization dedicated to the enhancement of the felon image with the president of the United States as chief felon and spokesman for all those who subsist under the onus of felony.

It's no fun being a felon; it is difficult to find a place to live, a place to work, people to hang with other than fellow felons.  This new national support for felony should not be lost on us.  It is an opportunity that may not occur a second time.  So, I say we organize and formalize an organization and call it Fans of Felons.

Richard E H Phelps II

Mingo