That's a Great Question

 THAT'S A GREAT QUESTION

Any time you hear, on talk radio, tv, or otherwise someone say "That's a great question", you automatically know that the question asked was really stupid and the person asked the question is trying to figure out how to answer such a stupid question without looking stupid him or herself.  It takes a minute, usually  the reason that the statement "That's a great question" was made by the interviewee in the first place - -  to make time to reflect before answering.

Reflection really does not help though.  The answer will normally be a stupid one, since the question was stupid, but, if luck prevails,  the people listening to this exchange may not know a stupid answer from an intelligent one.  Therefore, no harm would be done to the person asked.  At least one can hope. 

What is never done, but which would add immensely to the exchange and give entertainment is to simply declare that "I'm not going to answer a question that stupid and I am offended that you would ask such a stupid question for the only possible reason of making me look stupid."  One does not have to act in a stupid manner simply because one is invited to do so; in fact, one should show some intelligence if available.

Now, the person asking the stupid question may be stupid enough not to know how stupid the question is and therefore, if one were to enlighten the questioner of the stupidity of the question, one would, hopefully, be doing the questioner a service by pointing out how stupid he or she is being and maybe next time they might possibly frame their question in a manner that doesn't cause immediate blow back; or even better, obtain another line of work and not ask stupid questions ever again.

The reader may think that this is a little over the top:  not at all I say.  One should not be required to appear stupid, especially when and where a number of people may be listening or viewing or otherwise able to hear the exchange.  A stupid question is not for the purpose of presenting ideas nor of the exchange of ideas; it is for the purpose of making the interviewee appear stupid and ridiculous.   This is a situation that the interviewee is immediately aware of, but most often, because of the listening audience,  will refuse to acknowledge the stupidness of the question.  It is the opinion put forth here, that the acknowledgement of the stupidity of the question and refusing to answer such a stupid question, would enhance the reputation of the  person refusing to answer such a stupid question significantly.  And, in addition, it may have the effect of  slowing the incidence of future stupid questions by equally stupid interviewers.

Richard E H Phelps II

Mingo

We're Against It

 WE'RE AGAINST IT

We really need to be against more stuff, is what I say. I know I've got quite a list already and am ready to reach out to others to find things to be against. Right now I have what might seem to be quite a list but it feels incomplete. I'm always ready to add to it and am looking for candidates.

Right now my list includes muslims, buddhists, hindus, South Americans, Central Americans, Asians, lilliputians, anarchists, feminists, environmentalists, libertarians, gays, lesbians, LBFTQs, meth heads, other junkies, Marxists, communists, socialists, atheists, and whoever else doesn't vote Republican. Democrats and liberals are a suspect class, but grudgingly I will acknowledge they have a right to exist in a pluralist society such as ours. But not the others. Like we used to say about draft dodgers, if you don't want to be here and be a proud American and fight for your country and freedom, go live with people of your own kind; nothing's keeping you here. Good riddance.

The reason for this appeal, again, I'm wanting to add to the list - - it just doesn't feel complete. Maybe Zorastorians - - are there any of those left? There's got to be more people that I can be against and wish to disappear and if any of you have any good candidates let me know. We know who belongs and who doesn't here in middle America. You just can't be against too many people. It's a lack of character not to be against as many people as possible. After all, America was not made great by muslims, buddhists, hindus and other oddities of human nature and weneed to keep it that way or we will surely decline as a civilization and quickly.

And what's more, we need another really good enemy so that we maintain our military as the biggest and the best. That's why I'm happy to see that our elected representatives have decided China is an enemy. They declare it so. You only have to say someone is an enemy, and voilá, they are an enemy. Just about every other tweet (Star I should say) is giving us more reason to claim China as an evil doer - - and a really big one. Now they are buying up farm ground and rich Chinese are buying residences left and right and flying here to give birth of all things. It just isn't right, is what I say. We just have to be against Chinese specifically, not just Asians. (Mainland Chinese not Taiwanese.)

So in closing, give it some thought so I can add to the list. Maybe we can even get someone to pass a resolution - - make it official.

                                      Richard E H Phelps II 

Mingo

We Care!

 WE CARE!

Representative Dunwell has struck again.  He has now explained the importance of the Fetal Heartbeat Bill recently passed in the special legislative session.  Apparently, the three reasons for passage of the bill are:  (1) She has her own unique DNA, (2) She is not just a clump of cells, (3) She deserves to live.  And, it is all because we believe in "valuing and protecting life".

I simply would like to point out that according to recent accounts, thousands of Iowans are now being dropped from Medicaid coverage.  Of course, this is a good thing because we care and we value and protect life wherever it may occur.  We actually need more of this concern.  Surely we can kick off more people if we set our mind to it.  And at the same time, let's reduce unemployment benefits again.  We don't want people sitting around in urgent care facilities pretending to be sick or injured.  That will not do.  They can at least be serving up delicious burgers at McDonald's or Burger King.

It's very simple really:  Poor people do not need health care or a decent place to live and to raise their children.  It's simply not necessary.  Hovels are good enough for these people and if some of them get pregnant, so be it.  They can't get around having another mouth to feed by getting an abortion and terminating a heart beat.  The more poor people we have to do the work none of the rest of us want to do, the better.  If these people all of a sudden were to have decent health care or a decent place to live, we never would find enough people to work at Walmart or the local Dairy Queen.

It's clear that Representative Dunwell cares and cares deeply about the people of his district, especially those yet unborn - - even if they can't vote.  Ironically, these are the only people for which Representative Dunwell apparently cares - - oh, and those who own fast food businesses.  You can't really call them restaurants.  He cares about them.  I'm assuming, but could be wrong again, because they are the people who contribute to his campaigns.  I'm certain that the employees of McDonald's or Burger King don't vote for him and probably don't vote at all thinking correctly that it doesn't make any difference whether they vote or not, their lives will suck regardless.

So let's give two hurrahs for Representative Dunwell for looking out after our best interests; we couldn't be more proud of our elected officials in this state.  Our legislators spend their legislative time restricting our activities as much as possible.  More crimes, more injunctions, more book banning, more denial of health care and unemployment benefits, more denying women control over their bodies, more restrictions continually - - here in the land of the free and the home of the brave.  You just have to give credit where credit is due.

Richard E H Phelps II
Mingo