The Family

 THE FAMILY

We all know that "the family" is the foundation of civilization, right?  Its importance has been touted for generations as the cornerstone of all that is proper and good.  The family is important; family values are both necessary and good.  What can be more important than "the family"?

That may be the official proclamation, but we all know that it just isn't so.  The family has been and continues to be an impediment to all that is deemed valuable in a capitalist society and those in power understand this fully.  We, here in the United States, and Iowa in particular, do all we can to disrupt family life, make it difficult to maintain, and ensure that relationships between partners, spouses, children etc. are short and acrimonious.  

Before you say that I am an apostate and have no clue, let's go into a little detail about the State's view of marriage and other forms of partnership.  Divorce, or what they now call dissolution of marriage, is now very convenient; the legislature has made it quite simple.  One doesn't even need to hire an attorney any longer.  The documents needed are online and downloadable.  Quite easy really.  One can divorce oneself.  And then the statutes regarding protective orders where a person can go see a judge and get a protective order without an immediate hearing requiring the other party to be out of the house work really well in getting rid of an unwanted spouse when you can't wait for the dissolution.

The prime example though, and one of long standing, are Child-in-Need of Assistance proceedings.  Iowa has a Juvenile Code that is used extensively to break up families by taking children away from their parents.  This is done in every county of Iowa, probably weekly.  Kids are being yanked out of the home for various reasons by officials called "child protection workers".  This is another term for child snatchers.  And in order to get their kids back, the parents are required to go to through innumerable exercises visiting various counsellers and therapists and drug addiction gurus, and begging the court to let them have their children back all of which is usually pointless unless they do exactly what they are told for an extended period of time which for most people is unlikely or impossible (doing what you're told to do is the most important part).  Through the juvenile system, the State has honed its ability to destroy families; clearly with the understanding that those families who are now childless didn't deserve kids or family life in the first place; "we'll just give those kids to someone else".  And besides if both parents have to work at McDonald's to pay the rent, who's to watch the kids anyway?

The more recent efforts by the State to break up families are the domestic abuse statutes.  Domestic abuse is now similar to OWIs (DUIs), the more convictions you have the more severe the penalty.  All it takes is a call to the police, a statement "he hit me", and a red mark (especially on the neck) and off he goes to jail with a no contact order to follow that he can't go home and he can't contact his significant other, nor his children since he has to call mom to talk to the kids.   In addition to the above and since those examples may not be enough, a bevy of crimes have been passed regarding elderly abuse, sex abuse, child abuse, and all kinds of other abuse usually committed in the family room in front of the TV all of which result in someone being charged with Child Endangerment.  

You have to give it to the people in charge in this State, no family is safe.  We clearly find families unnecessary.  So in summary, it is clear that the State of Iowa is not pro-family but anti-family and does everything in its power to end this silly pro-family attitude that we all seem to still have that family is all important and is the bedrock of our civilization.  Those ideas are  nonsense and always have been and the legislature of Iowa understands this.  

Richard E H Phelps II

Mingo

Loser!

 LOSER!

Don't you just love a loser?  I know I do.  There is no easier mark for ridicule than a loser.  Ridiculing the loser is the converse of idolizing the winner.  You can't have one without the other, and it's fulfilled by athletic contests, or really contests of any kind where there is a winner and a loser.  A win-lose proposition.  The varieties of these situations are almost endless and new ones appear regularly - - for instance, cornhole, ax throwing, and pickleball.  In each endeavor we have winners and losers because we have made it a GAME.

TV and the internet take a bad rap for the blame of a thoughtless and meandering public.  TV and the internet do have the ability to gain a mesmerized public; one fully engaged, emotionally fixated.  A sporting contest does that, whether it be a horse race or a football game.  One obtains a favorite, one or the other.  The vast majority of games have two participants so picking a side is relatively easy.  Easier the better actually, not a lot of thought needs to go into the project of picking a favorite.

Now you note, that the person so engrossed is not playing the game - - a spectator merely.  The people playing the game are also totally engrossed in the game - - they are playing win/lose.  Winners believe they have reached the pinnacle; losers, and they are of equal numbers, obsess on the process of becoming a winner.  Winning is everything as Vince Lombardi said.  And so it is.  A winner is on top; a winner has succeeded; a winner is not a failure; a winner has glory.  It is the "feeling", the unparalleled feeling of victory.

But back to the losers.  Do you realize how many losers there are in this country?  Probably more than can be tabulated readily.  As it turns out, everyone who plays is either a winner or a loser - - that's just the way it is.  So, the real question is; is it worthwhile to be either a loser or a winner?  What does it mean anyway?  So you win a game of basketball or a game of yard croquet.  Is your life given meaning by winning or losing the game?  For many it would seem to be so.  I never felt I was a more complete human being after winning a basketball game nor did I feel incomplete as a human being if our team lost.  Ok, so we lost; I would have rather won than lost, but tomorrow it won't matter.  But I'm thinking that I may be an anomaly.

If to be idealized is the goal, then winning is necessary.  If winning is what gives your life meaning, so be it.  You are in the half of winners rather than the half of losers - - and it is so ephemeral.  Today a winner, tomorrow a loser - - never fails.  But those moments of glory are sweet and memorable and give our lives some meaning.  It fills that empty void of meaningless which normally clings to us throughout our lives.  So, ok, let us have our moments of glory; it really causes little harm and it makes our day.  And for the losers?  There is always tomorrow.

Richard E H Phelps II

Mingo